Wishing you all a Happy Easter weekend

Man with arms outstretched as if in a cross

The Long Weekend

And on the third day
He rose

And feeling only slightly
the worse for wear
He ventured out
into the world again

“What day is it?” He asked

For, verily,
somewhere along the way
He had lost Saturday

And He discovered that it was indeed Sunday
and that in his stupor
He must have slept through Saturday

“I have risen again,”
He told anyone who would listen

And He danced joyfully
on the garage forecourt
as ice melted
and rooftop water
fell upon him

This image and poem originally appeared on blipfoto.com.

copyright notice

What did you get for Christmas? I didn’t get a bike

Poem and pictures from the book Brilliant by Bernard Young
Copyright Bernard Young

This poem is from my book ‘Brilliant’.

Extract:

I got a massive box of chocolates
but I didn’t get a bike

I got some extra-special roller-skates
but I didn’t get a bike

I got a mind-blowing computer game
but I didn’t get a bike.

You can’t fool me, there’s something going on!

Image of pair of glasses with the word genius across each lens
Copyright Bernard Young

There’s Something Going On

When there’s a big cake in the kitchen
When there’s holly in the hall
When there’s tinsel round the telly
And presents wall to wall

When there’s mistletoe and ivy
And a decorated tree
I know something’s going on
You can’t fool me

What happens when Santa spends Christmas at his in-laws?

Cuddly toys in snow Santa and raindeer
Image copyright Bernard Young

Santa’s Christmas

(i)

This year,
though not by choice,
Santa Claus is spending Christmas
with his in-laws.

Ask him why
and he’ll just sigh
and say
‘Because…’

(ii)

Indoors

grim as a blizzard
prickly as holly
charming as a burst pipe

Mrs Santa…claws!

(iii)

Outdoors

the reindeer have downed sleigh
and are moaning
about the increased work-load
and the frozen pay.

Led by hard-nosed Rudolf the Red
(who, contrary to popular belief, is not nice)
they are imposing a work to rule
– a no slide rule on the ice
– a go slow on the snow.

Most folk, thinks Santa, just don’t realise,
being the boss is not all mince pies
and Ho! Ho! Ho!

(iv)

After much negotiation
and hard snowballing
Santa and the reindeer
have reached an agreement.

The Christmas delivery is safe.

Unlike Santa, who,
hurrying to and fro,
slips on the fast freezing snow.

Oh! Oh! Ow!

(v)

Christmas Day.
Work done.

Santa watches his mother-in-law
(a tough old bird)
wrestling with the turkey.

Boxing Day!
The fight goes on.

Two falls and a submission.
It’s over.

The turkey’s won.

(vi)

Sometimes
(don’t you know, know, know)
Santa, too, wrestles;
has a bout with self-doubt,
and loses.

At times
(don’t you know, know, know)
he even finds it hard
to believe in himself
himself.

This year,
to get him through this crisis,
to save him from distress,
I’m conducting a little survey
to discover, more or less,
who still believes in Father Christmas.

So if you do, shout YES!

Image of santa with words 'Yes? ? No?'
Image copyright Bernard Young

Bernard Young is an experienced performance poet who is available for workshops in schools, particularly primary age (KS1/KS2). He’s based in Manchester, but happy to travel further afield. Over the years he’s also worked successfully in partnership with Road Safety officers combining the road safety message with creative writing. To book Bernard for a workshop in your school, see Contact page.

Santa Claus ain’t coming, Junior has taken over

Poem and image
Copyright Bernard Young and Tod Leedale 2000

This Poem is from “Brilliant” and is available as a card from Redbubble: http://www.redbubble.com/people/youngpoet/works/9459104-santa-claus-aint-coming

A poem to get you in the Christmas mood, with mistletoe

A face in the snow
Image copyright Bernard Young
I hope everyone out there is looking forward to Christmas and hoping it will be a white one. Some folk have already seen the first snow fall. When I think of Christmas, I think of mistletoe.

Snow and Mistletoe

My heart is beating
fast, not slow,
as I stand beneath
the mistletoe.

My face is red.
My ears aglow.
I’ve just been snogged
by Rachel Snow*.

It was GREAT!
Not so-so.
She’s a terrific kisser.
Now you know.

* This is made up. Miss Snow is no-one I know.

Bernard Young is an experienced performance poet who is available for workshops, in schools particularly primary age. He’s based in Manchester, but happy to travel further afield. Over the years he’s also worked successfully in partnership with Road Safety officers combining the road safety message with creative writing. To book Bernard for a workshop in your school, see Contact page.

Time to Wrap up and Rap

Cat wrapped in a blanket
Image Copyright Karen Cropper
Since the season of cold weather is upon us, here’s a poem for you to rap as you go about your business. Might warm you up. Particularly if you perform a little dance at the same time.

Wrap Up Rap

When the wind is blowing
And snow is on the way
Get your woolly hat on
Wrap up warm today

And sing the wrap up
Sing the wrap up
Sing the wrap up rap

Find a scarf and good thick gloves
Don’t forget your coat
Be prepared for the attack
When Jack Frost grabs your throat

And sing the wrap up
Sing the wrap up
Sing the wrap up rap

Here comes thunder
Here comes hail
Hear the thunder
Dodge the hail

And sing the wrap up
Sing the wrap up
Sing the wrap up rap

Hat for head
Socks for toes
In your scarf
Bury your nose

And sing the wrap up
Sing the wrap up
Sing that wrap up rap

Bernard Young is an experienced performance poet who is available for workshops in schools, particularly primary age. He is based in Manchester, but will travel further afield. Over the years he has also worked successfully in partnership with Road Safety officers, combining the road safety message with creative writing. For more info, see the Contact page.

Winter Weather Warning – It’s going to be seasonally cold!

I’ve seen some posts on facebook about the fact that cold weather in winter is no surprise, it happens every year. It reminded me to share a poem about it.

A Cold Spell

Take a misty morning
A foggy night

A snuffly nose
A snowball fight

An icy road
Warm woolly tights

Add chilblain pain
A wind that bites

Then summon sleet
Think thoughts of white

Now look outside
It’s winter. Right?

Church just visible through fog
Image copyright Bernard Young

Bernard Young is an experienced performance poet who is available for workshops in schools, particularly primary age. He is based in Manchester, but will travel further afield. Over the years he has also worked successfully in partnership with Road Safety officers, combining the road safety message with creative writing. For more information, see the Contact page.